The Multi-Functionality of the Human Body Makes For Awkward Social Interaction!
It really does, when you think about it.
The human body is such a wonder of science, an oddity of biology, it is an enigma of a structure to comprehend. It is so complex. Doctors and scientists have studied the human body for centuries and they still haven't figured it out. It's that complicated.
All of biology is complicated. It's a science, and as we all remember from grade school, science is hard. Why do things work the way they do? They just do. Oh.
SCIENCE!
Human biology is especially complicated. It is different than that of the biology of plants or animals or micro bacteria because we as humans can actually study it. Micro bacteria can't say that. Neither can chimps. Thus, as humans, we are responsible for all the knowledge of everything, from the most simple organisms to the most complex. And so we study it. We study everything. We study plants, fungi, undersea creatures, the mating habits of naked mole rats, and behavioral patterns exhibited when children play Parcheesi against one another.
Understandably we are intelligent. We have rational thought, which allows us to agree that we are smart and that we should use that good judgment to study and theorize about and experiment with things. It is also that intelligence and rational thought that allows to see ourselves as who we are as animals. Yes, we are animals, and as animals we have tendencies that must occur naturally even though we have to think about them.
Animals that are not human probably don't think about or even realize how functional their bodies are. They just follow their instincts to survive and reproduce and be merry. We, as humans, also use our instincts to survive and reproduce, but we also have this thing we've been placed in called society, that we are all supposed to be a functioning part of. As parts of this society, we are forced to interact with one another.
From time to time, we get placed in a situation where the multi-functionality of our bodies comes to mind. Take, for example, the situation where two men are in the restroom at respective urinals. These men are comfortable with each other any other time outside this setting, but since they are here together, exposed, relieving their bladders, at the same time, right next to each other...it becomes awkward.
Now, what makes this awkward? Is it because they are both peeing? Or is it because of what they are peeing with? This organ between each of their pairs of legs happens to be the organ males must use to pee, but it is also one particular organ used during the act of mating with the opposite sex. Multi-functionality presents itself. And since men are not biologically inclined to associate mating with being around other guys and peeing, it tends to get a bit uncomfortable.
This particular scenario is not the only occurrence when multi-functionality combats awkwardness. Another example, perhaps a more common one to comprehend, is one of the many examples presented to us by the expansive use of the mouth. The mouth is used in so many things. Two of those major functions are speaking and eating. When these two activities are performed in too close proximity to one another, it makes for awkwardness. Talking while eating has never been acceptable, unless you can do it in a discreet way where it doesn't seem like you are chewing while trying to carry on a conversation, even though you clearly have food in your mouth. Some people manage to pull this maneuver off. Sometimes, these things don't even have to be happening at the same time for it to prove awkward.
Say you are meeting someone to talk about something, but twenty minutes ago, the person you're meeting just polished off a big salad. So now, when you're trying to talk to this person, you can't take your eyes off the piece of spinach that happens to be shaped like the state of Idaho and clinging to this person's top front right tooth. Gross! And yet, no one needs to explain the multi-functionality of his or her own body. It is evident, because we all take advantage of it.
The mouth as a platform of many functions brings about even more challenges when the activity of kissing comes into play. Kissing has long been used as a form of affection for human beings. There are many forms of it, from the gentle kissing of greetings to the prolonged kissing of more intimate activities. But nobody wants to kiss somebody whose breath smells like garlic, nobody! Not even for a second. Boy, was that ever awkward!
Kissing even counters speaking at times. The question, "do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" comes to mind.
Multi-functionality is put into use all over our bodies. Especially in the hands and feet.
"Don't touch me with those hands, I don't know where they've been!"
This is why you are supposed to wash your hands from time to time.
or
"You want me to massage your feet? Well, that's just great. Your feet...they're pretty, they're cute, they even have a nice bit of nail polish on the toes there. But haven't they been in your shoes...under the entire weight of your body...walking around...all day?!"
The multi-functionality of the human body has been key to our survival for so long. Just think about all the things the human body is capable of, especially when paired with the human mind. It does great things. It does amazing things. Think about all the things each individual part of the body does. It's amazing! It's wonderful. But, true, it can be a bit awkward at times. It can.
The human body is such a wonder of science, an oddity of biology, it is an enigma of a structure to comprehend. It is so complex. Doctors and scientists have studied the human body for centuries and they still haven't figured it out. It's that complicated.
All of biology is complicated. It's a science, and as we all remember from grade school, science is hard. Why do things work the way they do? They just do. Oh.
SCIENCE!
Human biology is especially complicated. It is different than that of the biology of plants or animals or micro bacteria because we as humans can actually study it. Micro bacteria can't say that. Neither can chimps. Thus, as humans, we are responsible for all the knowledge of everything, from the most simple organisms to the most complex. And so we study it. We study everything. We study plants, fungi, undersea creatures, the mating habits of naked mole rats, and behavioral patterns exhibited when children play Parcheesi against one another.
Understandably we are intelligent. We have rational thought, which allows us to agree that we are smart and that we should use that good judgment to study and theorize about and experiment with things. It is also that intelligence and rational thought that allows to see ourselves as who we are as animals. Yes, we are animals, and as animals we have tendencies that must occur naturally even though we have to think about them.
Animals that are not human probably don't think about or even realize how functional their bodies are. They just follow their instincts to survive and reproduce and be merry. We, as humans, also use our instincts to survive and reproduce, but we also have this thing we've been placed in called society, that we are all supposed to be a functioning part of. As parts of this society, we are forced to interact with one another.
From time to time, we get placed in a situation where the multi-functionality of our bodies comes to mind. Take, for example, the situation where two men are in the restroom at respective urinals. These men are comfortable with each other any other time outside this setting, but since they are here together, exposed, relieving their bladders, at the same time, right next to each other...it becomes awkward.
Now, what makes this awkward? Is it because they are both peeing? Or is it because of what they are peeing with? This organ between each of their pairs of legs happens to be the organ males must use to pee, but it is also one particular organ used during the act of mating with the opposite sex. Multi-functionality presents itself. And since men are not biologically inclined to associate mating with being around other guys and peeing, it tends to get a bit uncomfortable.
This particular scenario is not the only occurrence when multi-functionality combats awkwardness. Another example, perhaps a more common one to comprehend, is one of the many examples presented to us by the expansive use of the mouth. The mouth is used in so many things. Two of those major functions are speaking and eating. When these two activities are performed in too close proximity to one another, it makes for awkwardness. Talking while eating has never been acceptable, unless you can do it in a discreet way where it doesn't seem like you are chewing while trying to carry on a conversation, even though you clearly have food in your mouth. Some people manage to pull this maneuver off. Sometimes, these things don't even have to be happening at the same time for it to prove awkward.
Say you are meeting someone to talk about something, but twenty minutes ago, the person you're meeting just polished off a big salad. So now, when you're trying to talk to this person, you can't take your eyes off the piece of spinach that happens to be shaped like the state of Idaho and clinging to this person's top front right tooth. Gross! And yet, no one needs to explain the multi-functionality of his or her own body. It is evident, because we all take advantage of it.
The mouth as a platform of many functions brings about even more challenges when the activity of kissing comes into play. Kissing has long been used as a form of affection for human beings. There are many forms of it, from the gentle kissing of greetings to the prolonged kissing of more intimate activities. But nobody wants to kiss somebody whose breath smells like garlic, nobody! Not even for a second. Boy, was that ever awkward!
Kissing even counters speaking at times. The question, "do you kiss your mother with that mouth?" comes to mind.
Multi-functionality is put into use all over our bodies. Especially in the hands and feet.
"Don't touch me with those hands, I don't know where they've been!"
This is why you are supposed to wash your hands from time to time.
or
"You want me to massage your feet? Well, that's just great. Your feet...they're pretty, they're cute, they even have a nice bit of nail polish on the toes there. But haven't they been in your shoes...under the entire weight of your body...walking around...all day?!"
The multi-functionality of the human body has been key to our survival for so long. Just think about all the things the human body is capable of, especially when paired with the human mind. It does great things. It does amazing things. Think about all the things each individual part of the body does. It's amazing! It's wonderful. But, true, it can be a bit awkward at times. It can.
posted by Leland J. Fischer at 10:03 PM
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