Satin Sheets for life

Having satin sheets on your bed can be both a blessing and a curse. I have had a Queen-sized bed adorned with beautiful burgundy Satin Sheets since the beginning of the school year and have received many a compliment on them. They are 100 percent polyester and include the fitted and flat sheets, two pillowcases, two sham pillowcases, and one comforter. The reason I say that they are a blessing is because of the hoards of people (women, mostly) who become ecstatic the moment they find out I have them and find them irresistible to touch.
Furthermore, in purchasing the sheets, I have made an investment in that my future bedding experiences will always be comfortable and (hopefully) desirable by others. I also realize that if and when I get around to having sexual intercourse within my satin palace of paradise, it is going to be fabulous, if nothing else, aided to be all the more pleasurable on account of the aura the bedding emits.
Since the purchase of the sheets, I have not had the thrill of sharing that kind of experience with a partner thus far, or according to one Mike Badamo, have not, "christened them with the appropriate bodily fluids." So I divulge into why I say they are a curse. Not only do they require a great deal of constant attention, care, and maintenance, but they also absorb heat less than their cotton competition. Thus when sleeping alone in a queen-sized bed covered in satin that takes up miiiiiiles of space in my living quarters, I am constantly reminded of the bitter cold that surrounds my bed in every corner that the warmth of a human body does not touch. And with the winter months approaching, it is going to get a lot colder and less satisfying to be clinging to lifeless pillows, as opposed to a warm, lovable person (female).